Books, Books and More Books

A “few” years ago (probably 9-10 of them), I started recording the books I read and the length of time it took me to read them. I just write down the title, number of pages, the day I started and the day I finish it (if it’s midnight, I record it as the technical day lol). Somewhere along the way, I started not wanting to “roll-over” or “carry forward” the books I was reading. If I started a book in 2016, I wanted it done by December 31st, 2016. Starting in probably November, I start to look at the books I have, what I want to get finished for the year and line up the books I want to read in the following year. Just looking at my one bookshelf, I have 37 unread books (including a couple devotionals). That is not including the list of ebooks I have saved online, and the list of paperbacks to take out from the library. Every year, I keep telling myself I will not buy any more books until I finish the ones I already have unread, on my lists and on my bookshelves. I did pretty well most of this year. Then I got money for my birthday and I bought 5 more books, plus my friend sent me one for my birthday and 2 for Christmas! It’s truly an unending list. I always say, I hope there’s reading in heaven!!! The problem with this, is I tend to overwhelm myself with all the books I want to read. I have 37+ books and want to read them all RIGHT NOW!!! You know how people make all these New Year’s resolutions to get fit, exercise more and eat better. To cut back in spending, pay off debt and save for their dream vacation. To spend more time face to face with friends and less time on Social Media. Then somewhere around January 8th, life happens. You still have all that Christmas baking sitting there, and you could freeze it, but really, how long will it last? Might as well enjoy it now. You get busy, and stressed, and your kids are screaming, so you decide to hit the drive thru, just this once, tomorrow you’ll make a super healthy dinner and stick to the grocery/food budget. You’re doing so well, cutting back on your spending, then the vehicle gets a flat and the dog gets sick. Your kid gets sick and you need to take a day off work. It seems like no matter how well you do, how hard you try, life happens and pulls you down.

Let’s be honest. Life is always happening and there’s never a perfect time to do anything!

I don’t typically sit down and write out New Year’s resolutions. Goal setting, and sticking to my goals, is not a strength of mine - this is my resolution for 2019: be better at writing down goals and following through!

       So what’s this have to do with my “year of books” and preparing for 2019? Though I don’t have a typical New Year’s Resolutions list, I seem to have a New Year’s reading list to accomplish.
My list of books cover several different topics, from being a mom, to being a wife. Slowing down and being in the moment, enjoying the life you have and hearing from God.
If I sit and think about all the different areas of my life - as a mom, a wife, a woman/human being, home keeper, and dog owner. With managing my time, following a budget, or self-control. It’s easy for me to see all the ways I am failing. All the ways I keep messing up, over and over again. It’s depressing. It’s frustrating. It feels hopeless. Overwhelming.
And then, there’s all these books for me to read. I think about all these different areas of my life and I think, ok I have all these parenting books, so I have to read those, oh and I have all these marriage books, better read those, oh and I heard about this great dieting book, better add that to the mix. Next thing I know, I am reading all these books, on all these different subjects. And they can all be super powerful and impactful and chalk full of incredible insights and wisdom. But then I get to the point where I am reading just to finish books. It’s no longer a leisurely stroll through the park, listening to the birds chirping, watching squirrels climbing trees and noticing all the different flowers. Instead it’s a marathon and I am just focused on the end goal and getting through it in a timely manner.
I think it’s better to read, say 12 books a year, and have the insight and wisdom found in them actually make a difference in your day to day life, than read 52 books a year and not be able to talk to anyone about what was in them or what you learned. Or, more like me, you can talk someone's ear off about what you read but then your day-to-day life is still the same. You have the knowledge from the books, but without the practical application, you’ll never gain wisdom, and your life will still be a hot mess.

The beginning of this year involved a lot of me going back and rereading past books, and if they had discussion questions in the back, I took the time to write out answers. There are some books you just need to come back to, time and time again. And I did try to stick to a few different topics, like reading the books I have about anger and emotions, or reading books about finances and provision.

Now, as I look at the books on my shelf, I am so excited about all of them, and trying not to overwhelm myself with trying to figure out what to read and in what order. I want to read them all RIGHT NOW!
And I have just started working on my own business, which has added books I want to read about leadership and running your own business, as well adding all the studying I have been needing to do.

I already know what novel I want to read - Written in My Own Heart’s Blood. #8 in the Outlander series, which has only taken me about 2 years to read through! But now I need to sit and think about what other books I want to start 2019 off with.
I have a devotional I did about 2 years ago - Having a Martha Home the Mary Way - which combines time with God in devotion, along with a daily thing to clean (like picking one room to tackle, or scrubbing the kitchen floors and cupboards, or going through all the paperwork, etc). It’s a 31 day devotional, and I feel like that would be a good one to start for the New Year, especially since I am lazy and terrible at keeping up with housework (I am too busy reading HAHA). (Business goals - make enough money to hire a bi-weekly cleaner!).
I also desperately need to start, and stick to, the diet my doctor suggested to me. I would like to lose a few more pounds, but it’s more about feeling good physically, and not feeling sick all the time, as well as being obedient to what God is calling me to do in the area of my health.
    I want to work on daily time with God - my birthday books included 4 books about hearing from God, plus I have a couple to reread - and I want to get my house cleaned (but really, what’s the point? I got 3 young kids still living in it!!!!) and I want to work on my physical health. Oh and I also need to work on my finances and along with a physical diet, I need to go on a financial diet. I want to take my diet (I have a recipe book with a 28 day meal plan) and only buy the food needed, and no take out food. Tackle diet and finances in one swoop.
See what I mean? On my mind is all these things to work on - diet/exercise, finances, hearing from God, cleaning my house, as well as being more present with my children and fully entering into the moment and enjoying my life. I don’t want to be an angry, frustrated person, especially with my children and I have just a little bit of work to do in the area of being a wife. ;)

Now, I know it’s ridiculous to sit here and think about all my flaws (we see what we are looking for). Looking at ALL my flaws , and focusing on them, is not going to help me.
And I am not saying there are no good qualities about myself.
And I know God loves me, just the way I am, but I also know that God loves me enough to not leave me where I am. I know that God is gracious and Jesus covers my flaws, while He prunes me and makes me into His masterpiece. God isn’t holding up a mirror to me and pointing out all my flaws and showing me everything I have to fix RIGHT NOW. God takes it one day, one hour, one minute at a time. God takes it one “flaw” at a time. He works on me lovingly, gently, graciously. He’s not expecting me to read all 37+ books in the next year and work my way to being a better person by next December. God works in and through me. God calls me to do what I can do and He does what I cannot do. And I believe that in most of these books, God gave those authors those messages and those books are great tools in helping others, including myself. There is nothing wrong with the books. But I cannot allow them to overwhelm me and stress me, and make me feel like I HAVE to read them all, and RIGHT NOW. These books are meant to be helping and encouraging me, not hindering me!

I think I lost the point of why I originally sat down to write this, a long time ago. I guess what I had in my mind to write, and what I was meant to write, were slightly different.

I am excited for the year ahead and all the new books that will come with it! Goal - to actually enjoy the books and gain wisdom and insight from them, and apply the knowledge to my life.


Merry Christmas everyone! And may your 2019 be filled with light, love and laughter, and many, many great books! Blessings; Mrs.Duff

On My Way

Jesus Heals Ten Men With Leprosy

¹¹ Now on his way to Jerusalem, Jesus traveled along the border between Samaria and Galilee. ¹² As he was going into a village, ten men who had leprosy^[a] met him. They stood at a distance ¹³ and called out in a loud voice, “Jesus, Master, have pity on us!”

¹⁴ When he saw them, he said, “Go, show yourselves to the priests.” And as they went, they were cleansed.

¹⁵ One of them, when he saw he was healed, came back, praising God in a loud voice. ¹⁶ He threw himself at Jesus’ feet and thanked him—and he was a Samaritan.

¹⁷ Jesus asked, “Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine?¹⁸ Has no one returned to give praise to God except this foreigner?”¹⁹ Then he said to him, “Rise and go; your faith has made you well.”
Luke 17:11-19  (NIV) (emphasis mine)

          I don’t know about you, but when I read this story, it seems pretty clear that it is highlighting the gratefulness of the Samaritan. Jesus clearly points out that 10 lepers came and asked for healing, and questions where the other 9 are and tells the Samaritan that his faith has made him well (meaning physically as well as spiritually). Thanksgiving – gratefulness – is a big theme in the Bible. It is incredibly important to always be thankful, as every good gift comes from God.
      There is, however, another part of this verse that stuck out to me. “As they went, they were cleansed.”
There are many healing stories in the bible, from the Old Testament to the New, from Jesus to his disciples. There are stories of instant healing, of Jesus calling to a cripple to get up and walk, or to stretch out their withered hand. When these people did as Jesus asked, they were healed. But there are some stories, where the person asking for healing is healed, but not right there on the spot. Obeying Jesus’ instructions lead to their healing, but they have to do a little more than “just” stand up or stretch out their hand.

        Take, for instance, this story in the Old Testament, found in 2 Kings.

Naaman Healed of Leprosy

5 Now Naaman was commander of the army of the king of Aram. He was a great man in the sight of his master and highly regarded, because through him the Lord had given victory to Aram. He was a valiant soldier, but he had leprosy.^[a]

⁹ So Naaman went with his horses and chariots and stopped at the door of Elisha’s house. ¹⁰ Elisha sent a messenger to say to him, “Go, wash yourself seven times in the Jordan, and your flesh will be restored and you will be cleansed.”

¹¹ But Naaman went away angry and said, “I thought that he would surely come out to me and stand and call on the name of the Lord his God, wave his hand over the spot and cure me of my leprosy. ¹² Are not Abana and Pharpar, the rivers of Damascus, better than all the waters of Israel? Couldn’t I wash in them and be cleansed?” So he turned and went off in a rage.

¹³ Naaman’s servants went to him and said, “My father, if the prophet had told you to do some great thing, would you not have done it? How much more, then, when he tells you, ‘Wash and be cleansed’!” ¹⁴ So he went down and dipped himself in the Jordan seven times, as the man of God had told him, and his flesh was restored and became clean like that of a young boy.

2 Kings 5: 1, 9-14 (NIV)

                  We see here that Naaman went in search of healing, and when the prophet, Elisha, sent out his servant to tell Naaman what to do, Naaman was not happy. Naaman was a great man, a valiant solider, highly regarded by his master. He wanted Elisha to come out and give him special treatment, to wave his hand over the spot and to instantly heal him. However, Naaman had a part to play in his healing. He had to humble himself enough to realise that, although Elisha did not personally come out to see him, Elisha did give Naaman the answer to his healing. And Naaman had to humble himself and go dip himself in the Jordan, though he believed the rivers of Damascus were better. And he had to dip himself into the water seven times! After Naaman’s servants talked to him and got him to see reason, Naaman did as Elisha told, and he was healed. His skin became clean like that of a young boy! I have 3 children, and I tell you, as an adult, I wish I could have skin as clear and smooth as theirs!
        Naaman had a part to play in his healing. He had to actively, and humbly do what Elisha had told him to do.
As with the 10 lepers, they called out to Jesus for healing and he told them to go show themselves to the priest, and it was as they obeyed Jesus’ words and were on their way, that they were healed.

        This is where I find myself on my journey to healing. To figuring out what upsets my stomach and healing my gut, and figuring out what causes the break outs around my lips. Jesus could just instantly heal me and I could be dancing through the grocery store, praising God, eating whatever it was I wanted. But that wouldn’t draw me closer to Jesus. That wouldn’t answer the questions of what foods I can tolerate and what foods I could not. And that would definitely not lead to weight loss, or even maintaining my weight, but would definitely lead to weight gain!
        My relationship with Jesus does not tie me down in a bunch of rules, laws or legality. The grace of God gives me the freedom, the power, to say no to the things that are not healthy for me – whether that is actual food, relationships, or activities. With God’s grace I am empowered to go along this journey of discovery and healing. To have a healthy relationship with food and a deeper relationship with Jesus.
Right now, I am on my way to healing, and I know it will not always be an easy, fun road to take. The path to life is narrow and few find it! But there is adventure, freedom, joy and healing to be found along this path.

        May I continue on my way to healing and always remember to thank Jesus for the journey and the healing!

God Bless.